Need Some Input

27 05 2008

This is what I just posted over at the QVC forums:

Does anyone here know what QVC’s policy is about customers who are addicted?

My story: My MIL is a serious QVC addict. She spends at least $2000 a month on QVC stuff. Jewelry and small appliances and kitchen items and clothing — those are her big areas. Christmas decorations and food and miscellaneous household items show up, too.

She gets a delivery to her home almost every day.

DH and I spent a couple of weeks clearing things out and storing them in the garage and generally trying to make her home passable about a year ago. And we just spent another day last week doing what we could but it’s not nearly as cleared up as the first time as we are out of storage space in her home.

She is a 78-year-old widow and, even though she sees family members quite often (most of us live nearby), she has enough free time on her hands and enough income to stuff her house full to the rafters of this stuff she does not need.

And she really doesn’t have enough income to continue this. She has begun eating into a home equity loan she has on the house.

She knows she has a problem and will swear off for short bursts, like any other addict. But then she gets in a mood and the boxes start again.

She has health issues and may not be thinking clearly all the time and we just feel she is being taken advantage of but have no idea how to intervene. We talk to her but, as I said, she stops and then starts up again.

I suppose I could wrestle the credit card out of her hand but I was hoping there was some sort of QVC policy about this that might help her concerned family.

Thanks for any help!

NC

So has anyone else been through this? Any pearls of wisdom?

Nance

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17 responses

27 05 2008
Not June Cleaver

Oh Nance! I wish I could help you. That must be so frustrating to see her blow through money on useless stuff. Their sales pitches are so good though. My sister is completely addicted to this, but she is working and making a 6 figure salary and has no kids. She is hooked. My neighbor, a retired woman living alone, gets a UPS delivery every day. We joke about it, but I never realized just how serious it is.

It seems that there should be SOMETHING you can do. I doubt QVC would help, they love people like her. But there must be some way to make your MIL see what is happening. Perhaps she would even agree to having you take the credit card. Of course, that would mean her giving up the freedom to use it as she wished. Yikes. That sounds almost as hard as taking away the driver’s license, which is a horrible thing to have to do.

I hope you find an acceptable answer. Sorry I don’t have one for you.

27 05 2008
Not June Cleaver

OK, so why am I now a pentagon head?

27 05 2008
Not June Cleaver

So I’m looking at some other posts and comments and I see that JJ gets a big ole blue brain, and you, Nance, get a blockhead? Who chooses these avatars? LOL!

28 05 2008
JJ

LOL – Nance and I keep playing. This is a new wordpress setting to generate unique avatars for commenters who don’t put in an image for themselves. There are five or six types including a patchwork quilt pattern thing we tried for a couple of weeks. This new one is supposed to be funny monster faces.

Except mine which isn’t auto-generated; I chose it, just thought it emphasized the human brain as beautiful and compelling, made it like a work of art. Thinking Parents and all that! But now seeing it through NotJC’s eyes, I’ll have to take it personally instead, consider that it is MY big ol blue brain, maybe change my name to BOBB? 😉

Whether Nance changes hers to Blockhead is of course, up to her!

28 05 2008
JJ

Thinking that Nance used to present as “Flipflopper” — hmmm!

28 05 2008
Dawn

Is there any way (with her permission of course) to block the channel?

28 05 2008
JJ

Hey, there’s a thought – could you do the parental control lock thingee with a numeric code, and then if-when she was home alone and wanted it back, she wouldn’t be able to unlock it again.

But maybe also there’s a need for her to get drawn into something new, too, not just to lose this channel but to gain different ways to meet that same need? If she were an unschooling kid, that would be my advice. I guess I should be consistent!

28 05 2008
JJ

Not just new ways to spend her time but also new ways to think about her money and investments, what she can do with it? That kind of money can be very powerful to anyone and anything she cares about. . .

28 05 2008
JJ

Dawn, how do you feel about being “PointyHead”?

28 05 2008
NanceConfer

First, I am not a blockhead! 🙂

My flipflop avatar would be perfect for this time of year but I guess is rotates away, JJ? I want it back, darn it!

Thanks, Dawn, for your comments. Nobody seems to have a solution but at least by posting here and at QVC I have seen that a lot of families have this problem.

QVC has no direct incentive to do anything about a problem like this but you’d think there’s be some interest in maintaining good public perception. Maybe I can get the lunatic fringe hsers to boycott them!? 🙂

Any sort of control on my MIL is very much like losing her driver’s license. Which she is about to do. She hasn’t paid her car insurance and probably couldn’t get it renewed because she keeps crashing into things — no people so far. So that’s a matter of time.

And she’s smart enough to see what’s going on in some part of her thinking. Then has no way to age gracefully, apparently, with the rest of her brain.

And she seems to think we are all interested in inheriting this garbage — like the gaudy jewelry. We’d all much rather use her assets to help her move to a nice assisted living facility. There’s a good one right around the corner from her.

But I don’t know if they allow UPS deliveries. 🙂

Nance

28 05 2008
NanceConfer

OK, important problem addressed. 🙂

I went in and fiddled with the avatar settings. Anyone who has an avatar in WordPress should see their normal design show up. Anyone who does not have an avatar in WordPress should see a blank.

Unless you’d rather see a pointy head, DAwn? 🙂

Nance

28 05 2008
JJ

Hey, why can’t we have the avatars show up, AND the funny faces instead of a blank? Will that work?

28 05 2008
JJ

Ha! – now as long as Nance stays a flipflopper, this should work? Btw, I just realized the funny faces are not the monster shapes, but something called “wavatars” –

28 05 2008
NanceConfer

And if you don’t want the computer-generated funny face, you have to set up an avatar for yourself.

Not difficult to do. Even I managed it! 🙂

Nance

28 05 2008
Not June Cleaver

And we still haven’t solved the QVC problem, Bobb.

28 05 2008
JJ

Damn, you got me, PentagonPuss . . .

29 05 2008
Dawn

the pointy head works for me…I don’t usually have an icon here.

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